As an almost 10-year old mom, I really appreciated this KDrama. It showed a lot of realities of a newly given birth mom – whether stay-at-home, working, first child or not, or even for a mommy of an angel. They realistically showed the ups and downs of what every newly given birth mom and what comes after it aka the 4th trimester.
What actually is a Birthcare Center? It’s an institution where moms who just gave birth go for post-natal care. They say, inadequate postnatal care also leads to mothers’ health problems later. Apparently, they have this wellness centers for moms who just gave birth in SoKor. I’m not so sure if we have this kind here in the Philippines. As we are more on having nannies or new born nurse help us around. But let me know if meron ha? Based on the KDrama, a Birthcare Center is a place where moms get to rest well, eat well and get to actually take care of their well-being. They aren’t hands on with their babies at this point. They have scheduled feeding sessions and mommy-baby time. Nasa parang nursery ang mga babies. The moms would also have trainings like how to breastfeed properly or anong how good poop looks like. They are well-assisted and well-taken cared of. Husbands can stay there as well. It is a 2 week paradise for both parents, especially for the mom.
In the series, we get to be introduced to different kinds of moms – the perfect moms and the struggling moms. But little did we know, even those who are perfect can be struggling too. Sharing with you what I’ve processed after watching the fun and quirky series that you’ll surely learn a lot from. I hope you get to feel it in your heart as much as I did, even if I’ve already been a mom for a decade already.
1. Parents need to have a strong support system. BOTH Parents, not only the mommy. Parehas nilang kailangan ng masasandalan – our parents, our friends, pero much better kung ang isa’t isa ang sasandalan natin.
2. Normal na we get scared lalo na sa mga new parents because having a baby brings us to a new world, one that we’ve never been before. Have courage to ask for help if it’s been hard.
3. Mga husbands natin, most of the time mga clueless sila sa feelings nating mga wives. It would be nice if they will also learn to be sensitive sa feelings ng mga wives nila, to be always be there to help, to assure that everything will be okay. Be vocal. Now, if times are tough, mga mommas, tayo ay maging vocal sa ating nafifeel at di naman sila manghuhula. They’d appreciate it more kasi they’d know agad what they need to do to help us. Also, di lang tayong mga mommies ang gusto ng mga compliments. Kahit paminsan minsan lang, i-compliment natin sila and don’t overlook their needs as well.
4. Pag may kakilala tayong bagong panganak, usually we ask “How’s the baby?”. Why don’t we normalize asking How’s the mom as well?
5. Different moms, different situations. That’s why don’t ever compare your experiences. Not because you see one as a perfect mom and you feel that you are not, doesn’t mean na wala siyang struggles inside. Iba-iba pinagdadaanan natin and if we keep on comparing, tataas lang ang ating insecurities.
6. Do whatever makes you comfortable and not with what other people has to say. Tayo lang ang nakakaalam what’s best for our babies.
7. Lahat naman ng new moms walang alam halos. Some do research and really plan even how they will give birth. Some ends up with nothing, because they don’t have resources to do so. But that doesn’t mean na wala silang karapatan maging ina kasi wala silang alam. We may have learned everything about childcare, pero darating pa din sa point na ma-lolost in transition tayo dahil sa hindi ineexpect na situation. Never judge a mom based on what she knows or does not know. One can’t always be prepared. Being a mom would come naturally to us the moment we hold our baby in our arms – knowledgeable or not. Moms grow with their babies, sila pa ang magtuturo sa atin ng maraming bagay.
8. Di porket hindi nag breastfeed ang isang mommy, or hindi nag co-sleeping or hindi gaanong attach sa bata ay masamang ina na sya. Sometimes may dahilan bakit di nila nagagawa ang isang bagay. Lahat ng mommies are the best mommies to their babies, at lahat mahal nila ang babies nila. Di sa dami ng gatas na susukat ang pagmamahal ng isang ina.
9. Some worry that they won’t be desirable anymore. If we feel that way the only thing we could do is to make an effort to make ourselves feel good. Di porket mommy na, hindi na pwede mag dress up ng maganda and to look good and wear make up. Buy something for yourself as well. Deserve mo yan!
10. Stay-at-home moms work just as hard at working moms. Pero di masamang ina ang mga working moms for choosing that path. Di ibig sabihin masama sila. SaHMs doesn’t just hang at home too. They work hard at home too. Also, di porket working mom ka, di mo mapapalaki ng maayos ang mga anak mo.
11. Sometimes we don’t know who we are anymore, and we lost ourselves in motherhood. But some doesn’t know ourselves at all. But we look at our child and we see our purpose and why we are now at this moment. It’s a new world for moms. Moms devote themselves to their children that they would miss out on themselves. They may feel resentful. It is okay and it is part of the journey. But know that we can always do what we love doing pre-motherhood. Also know that it is always okay to take a breather even just for 5 minutes or 1 day. It’s part of our journey because at the end of the day it will be our babies whom we will crave for and need and want and love to see.
12. Moms want to feel that they are always needed. Even if pagod na pagod na sila. Pero totoo it makes them happy.
13. Some moms put aside their dreams to raise their kids. Some moms don’t. It’s okay. Different circumstances in life. It’s really a courageous thing to do when one sacrifices their dream. For those who can’t sacrifice because they need it for their mental health – It is okay. At the end of it all, moms need to be happy. If that’s what they need to do to be happy, then so be it. Happy moms, Happy Babies, right?
14. It’s ok if we are not in a good place as long as we recognize it and do something about it.
15. When we become a mom, we gain life long friends through other moms. Agree kayo diyan? Shout out sa aking preggo mom batchmates na until now ay nakasupport pa din and kung san my son gained lifelong friends with. Imagine since nasa womb pa lang sila, tropa tropa na XD (Hello Momma Chikas!)
Pregnancy is such a joyful and beautiful process. One may have a very exhausting delivery and the new life after may seem miserable. It won’t be a walk in a park as we may encounter lots of problems along the way, both for the baby and mom – physically, mentally, emotional and some even financially. We even become a different person once we become a mom but it will always be the most fulfilling stage of one’s life. Our purpose driven life.
Just remember: “You don’t have to be a perfect mom to be a good mom. You just have to be happy and make sure your child is too.”
TvN’s Birthcare Center is an 8-part series following Oh Hyun Jin (Uhm Ji Won) as she enters a new stage of her life as a mom. She is a career driven woman and the youngest executive at her company. She is, though, the oldest mom at the birthcare center where she’s staying. She had a hard time giving birth, almost dying and in the next 2 weeks she will be transitioning to her new role as a mom while having all the help that a new mom needs in the center and interacting with fellow moms as well.
Birthcare Center is available in Netflix. Click this link. Photos from TvN.